THERAPY IN MOTION | FIRST DAY OUT| KING OJ

AFTER BEING IN LOCK UP AND IN THE JAIL SYSTEM FOR THREE DAYS KING OJ TELLS HIS SHOCKING EXPERIENCE FROM ARRESTED TO THE CELL. 

Transcript

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What's the deal? It's the greatest host of all time, King OJ the Zen Master. And right now I had to drop an emergency pod due to some unfortunate circumstances. But I gotta do it for educational purposes. So this gonna be like the first day out edition since I you know basically I'm gonna give you a rundown. Um so just a few days ago. Well actually I'm gonna say this a few hours ago, I just got out a uh lock up from doing uh basically a three-day bid. Um wound up. So I'm gonna say this is how everything transpired. So me and my girl, we on the way to get uh food and whatnot. Um as I look up, I see this police uh truck behind me or whatever. So I'm I ain't thinking nothing of it. I'm like, they gonna jump behind me anyway. They always do. So I'm just on something like alright, I ain't really gonna trip on it. I'm gonna just keep doing what I'm doing. And if they hit their lights, they hit their lights. If they don't, they don't. So I'm already almost at my destination to grab the food and whatnot that you know we was on the way to get. And they hit they lights as I uh I'm merging over the turn and they hop behind me. So they pull up, they like uh, you know, the usual license registration and all that with wool. So the one that's on my side, he like, um, yeah, so you got your gun on you? As if he know me or something. So I'm like, well yeah. He like, where is it? I'm like, in the door. So as he reaching for that, I'm just still looking for my CPL and all of the other stuff. So he like, you got your CPL? I'm like, yeah, let me just look at my armrest, you know, so I can grab it and whatnot. And as I'm looking, I'm like, damn, I'm not finding it or whatever. So I'm like, damn, I probably uh took it out when I last cleaned the car out or whatever. So I just tell him like I ain't got it. He like, alright, I'll be right back. So he goes check, you know what I'm saying, run my name and whatnot. He come right back, like, yeah, step out the car. I'm like, oh shit. So I already know it's about to go down because they don't never tell me step out the car. They always just let me go no matter what it had been, what it's been. And you know, I didn't have other cops from other cities even notice that my gun was there and never once told me to get out the car for no reason. But I'm gonna be honest, my CPL was expired. Um, it expired July of this past year, and we currently in March. So they like, you got any other illegal weapons in the car? I'm like, illegal? What you mean? This is my gun. Like, I bought this gun legally from Dunham's, and you know what I'm saying? I got receipt, paperwork, all that, you know what I'm saying? My lockbox, all that that it came with. So, um, he like, get on the car, you under arrest? And I'm like, wait, what? I'm really about to get locked up. Remind you, I never been locked up in my life. At no point did I ever think I'll be getting locked up for nothing. Because I just don't be on no bull for real. So I'm like, uh, alright, whatever. I ain't even gonna trip. I'm gonna just go with the flow because ain't nothing I could do at this point. It's over with. So I get in the back seat, and another truck pull up behind the one that already stopped me. And so two cops get off that one, so it's four cops total outside. They cheesing hard as hell, slapping fives, all kinds of shit. Good job, way to go. That's great. Like, I'm like the bamboozle is real, like this is crazy. Was what I'm witnessing right now. I'm in the back of this truck, cuffed up, on my knuckles for real, watching them celebrate my demise, and I'm like, ain't no way. So, we on our way to the precinct, having a little small talk here and there. I'm just like, you know what? Y'all's job is to catch me slipping or catch people slipping. Our job is to not let y'all catch us slipping. It's on me. I take full accountability that I didn't have my stuff in order. But I just don't like how they, you know, played everything out. So it's just in the moment my mentors being compromised. I'm like, yeah, this shit ain't looking good at all. Because they already celebrating, they slapping fives, they hooray. It's it's it's like they throwing a mini parade as if they just came back from a 3-1 comeback and hit the buzzer beater for game. That's how happy they seem that they caught me with my gun without my CPL. So not only that, um, they got my girl emotional and whatnot. So it's like that's compromising her mental too. I'm like, never once did I want to, you know what I'm saying, see that. Especially not under these circumstances. So we say our goodbyes and whatnot, and I'm on to, you know, the station. So we get to the station and you know, they fingerprint me, they pat me down, all that, they ship me on to uh this holding cell. So for people that ain't never been locked up, I'm gonna paint the picture for you on how this holding cell even looks. So it's a bit, it's it's four benches in there, it's two toilets, but it's a wall, uh a halfway wall dividing both. It's like one room, but it's divided with a with half of a wall. So I see hella people on the first side, so I'm like, fuck it. I'ma just go on the other side and chill over there. Um, I ain't about to squeeze in between nobody. That's too crazy for me to even if I was even thinking about that. So I'm just about to go on this side. So I go over there, sit down, I'm like, damn. It's a toilet right next to me. I'm praying like I pray don't nobody come in here and have to take a shit. It's like, because I can't do nothing about it. We in the we sales are really just closed-in bathrooms with benches and stuff like that. Like that the holding sales are with benches. That's the only thing in there is toilets and benches. Um so a dude do he did come in there and he came in there right after I was just thinking that. And literally came and sat, like basically right next to me and just started taking the shit. I'm like, this is wild as hell. But I still can't do nothing about it. And anybody that knows me know I got a weak ass stomach. Like, I smell something a little off. I'm already like damn near about to throw up, you know what I'm saying? So I'm just like, this just ain't it for real. So do uh wind up, you know, doing his business. He goes lay down. I'm just looking at the walls, the doors and shit, the windows, it's shit and vomit like on these windows and on the door, and it's like blood and shit on the wall. Remind you where the toilets are, it's a camera right there staring at your shit no matter what. Like, it's no way you can block it. It's it's right there. So outside of that crazy shit, um, the next crazy shit I see, a big white dude named Princess is in this motherfucker. So this motherfucker, like, just keep peeking around the corner where me and the other dude, I'm like, why is he looking over here? Why he keep looking over here? He the only one in the cell with uh in the holder cell with us that got a blanket. So he asked the dude, and remind you, the dude that was over there, he was off morphine, so he damn near in zombie mode for real. He just making noises, having withdrawals, all kind of shit going on. It's like damn near he turning this he's turning into something else while he's in here with us. So do ask him like uh you want this, you want the sheet? I'm like, I pray, bro. Don't take the sheet, bro. Take the sheet. Oh, thanks, bro. Thanks, I appreciate it. Why princess try to come get under the sheet with bro? I'm like, I know I'm not witnessing sexual assault right now, so it's like it's about to go down and we how you horny, you trying to take booty, and we just got in here is crazy. So outside of that, um, he like, oh no, bro, I'm not. No, no. So he looking disappointed. He like, oh sorry, uh, he goes back on the other side of the wall. So we just in there. When by the time I get there, I don't even have a clue what time it is. We just in there for hours, and I don't know. That was driving me crazy alone. So my mental is just spiraling that in this moment. I'm calm, but it I'm like still a little just a little rattled because I'm like, I don't even know what time it is. Like, I really have no clue what time it is right now, so it was just fucking with me, just to be real. Then you had all these just deputies that just didn't care about nothing. Like, so everything we would ask, it would just get like overheard or like overlooked. They ain't trying to hear nothing, they ain't trying to, you know what I'm saying, do nothing. And it's so crazy because remind you, so when it comes to eating in there, I'm detoxing, so I'm vegan all the way vegan right now, been that way since March 1st. So we at what's that March 18th when I get in there? So they having all these different trays, and I'm like, man, I'm not eating this shit. I don't give a fuck what the food is on the menu. I'm not eating it at all. If I'm gonna break my fat, or I'm not fast, but if I'm gonna break my detox, I'm definitely definitely not breaking it on jail food. I'm sorry, I'm just not doing that. So everybody in there like, bro, you just you just gonna starve. I'm like, bro, I'm good. I already haven't been eating bullshit. I'm not about to start with this. If I am gonna go back to eating bullshit, they like, uh, you gon' man, you gotta eat. You gotta nah, y'all gotta eat. I'm straight. I'm not eating none of this shit. I'm telling one uh one dude in there, I'm like, bro, I'm vegan. He like, the Salisbury steak plant-based. I'm like, bro, ain't no fucking way they got plant-based nothing in here, bro. Like, we locked up, bro. It's nothing special about this shit. No, I think they make it with soy. Alright, you eat that shit. I'm straight. Outside of that, it's they having everybody come in here, they just stocking up these sales left and right, left and right, left and right. I'm like, damn, this shit is like a lab. Like, it's just we damn near like mice, and we just in here. They they watching how we reacting with each other, they don't really care, so they got us in there. Some people got violent crimes, some people got traffic violations. So it's just like at the end of the day, what can you really do? You can't tell them, well, I don't want to be in here with whoever, whoever. I'm in here because I just ain't have my paperwork together. But it's all people from all walks of life. Some people that came in off DUI, some people that came in. One dude in there hit his girl and called on him. He then smacked the the dog out and murdered it basically. So it's so many different people in there, it's levels to it. They telling me it's nine levels. We on the between the first and the fourth level, then it just gets worse and worse and worse. Then they got maximum security all the way at like what seven through nine, I think they said, or eight and nine. But uh the maximum security prisoners is working to like do stuff for us as far as like get us our food, um, get us changed over, uh, teach us how to use the phones and whatnot. And I'm in here, first I'm in the holding selling my my street clothes that I came in with. So I'm thinking like, okay, well, I'ma just be chilling in the holding cell, I'ma guessing, until court. They tell me I got court in the morning. So I'll be out tomorrow morning for real. That's what they told me. So everybody in there is just waiting on their court time. It get to me, everybody getting their court time actually. Um it get to me, they not calling me. So I'm like, damn, did they forget about me or something? Like, how how the hell they ain't called me yet? So I asked one guard, I'm like, hey, uh, did they forget about my court? He like, what did you say? I'm like, did they my court date, like I mean my court time, did they, you know, overlook it or something? He steady acting like he don't hear me, then he put his key, click his key to whatever side, and then it just the door starts sliding closed. He just walk off. I'm like, ain't no way that they treat me like this for real. So I'm like, well, it is what it is. I'm still you know gonna take accountability for whatever reason I'm in there. Oh, remind you, why we they told us they pulled me over anyway, is because they said my plate wasn't illuminating. I'm like, what the hell do that even mean? How is how is that a probable cause to pull somebody over? Every time, the crazy part is every time I ever got pulled over, it was real real life some bullshit reason on why I was pulled over. I done heard my license plate light was out. I done heard they ran my license plate and my car was stolen. I done heard that the plates was fake. I didn't heard, I didn't heard at all. I'm like all of this shit just they to me that should be against the law because they don't understand how mentally damaging that is to constantly get pulled over and hear bullshit reasons why you trying to lock me up. So, anyway, fast forwarded back to intake and all of that. So we wind up getting our clothes, um they give us blues. So in this jail, I seen three different colors. You had us in blues, you had another group of uh prisoners was in Burgundy, then you had the maximum security ones in the orange. So I don't even know where Burgundy was, I don't know what level they was, but I just know I saw them. So as we learn and you know, we well I'm learning in the moment a lot of this. So we get to um the mug shot portion of it. I'm looking like, damn, I'm really taking the mugshot right now. Like this ain't something that I ever imagined for me at all. Like they basically turning me into a statistic as we speak. And I'm just like, damn, I gotta figure out how to control my mind so I don't fuck around and snap it here. Cause I know I don't belong in here. I don't care what I did or didn't do with my paperwork, I know me as a human being, I don't belong behind bars. Like to be locked up, it's it's crazy because I developed a new respect for people that do real time and don't go crazy. Because even just me being there for the three days that I was there, I could feel my mind shifting. And I'm like, what the fuck? What why do I feel like I'm starting to think like a convict a little bit? Like, it's just changing, like, like you have to basically adapt as soon as you get in there because you could get, you know what I'm saying, ate up real fast if you ain't on your toes. You ain't, you know what I'm saying? A lot of people might not be used to it. I ran into a lot of people in there that was there for traffic shit, bullshit. They ain't never been in in uh jail before. So this people in there scared, shitless. And I'm like, for me, I'm not about to look shit, you know what I'm saying? Like, I'm scared, I'm not about to act scared. All I'm gonna do is tell God to give me the strength to make it through while I'm in here and help me to adapt to my circumstances as long as I need to so I can make it through this what however long a bit gonna be. Cause after I didn't get my court date that first day, I ain't believe shit else. Cause I'm like, it ain't no telling when I'm gonna get out now. And nah, you fast forwarded till now it's Friday, and they telling me I still have court, but yet if it goes past a certain time, shit, now I'm gonna have to stay in that motherfucker for the whole weekend too. So I'm like, yeah, I pray that don't happen because I'm already feeling the shift mentally, like I said. So it's like, okay, I'm talking to myself, I'm telling myself, shit, you got this shit. This shit ain't shit. You know what I'm saying? It is what it is, and I'm just observing the different shit. First off, it's cold as fuck in there. So you gonna probably get sick, most likely. Like when I'm in that motherfucker, my nose instantly just starts running, and it's so cold in there. Where the benches is, it's it's really concrete that's just uh lifted, it's not really a bench. So that shit already fucking up my back. Fucking I got a herniated disc, so that shit really fucking with my whole alignment, and I'm like, yeah, this ain't it. So fast forward a little bit, we get to um they tell us, yeah, y'all going upstairs. Meaning we about to go to a pod, basically. So for everybody that don't really know in these pods, you in general population with all of these different criminals for whatever they done did. It don't matter. You could be in there with people that didn't kill people. I'm in there with people that's doing 15. I'm in there with people talking about they got 30, all kind of shit. Like, I don't know if what know what they did for real because I ain't reading paperwork. I really don't give a fuck. I'm trying to just keep my mind, you know, on straight just long enough so I can get the fuck out of here and you know what I'm saying, get back to reality. So they give me a celly, and I told bro, I'm gonna shout him out. Uh bro named Darren Veach. And he a 55-year-old white dude, cool as shit. Um, when I first got in there, he giving me the ups and on different shit, and you know, I'm like, okay, cool, you know what I'm saying? You got rules in here. If you do, that's cool. Just let me know how you feel, you know what I'm saying? He like, no, just respect and we good. Oh, I'm alright. Shit, I'm already on that, so we good. So whole time another inmate is bullying. My celly, so the shit weird as hell. Cuz I'm like, bro, ain't even doing shit. He ain't, you know what I'm saying, messy. He don't be in this motherfucker trying to start shit, nothing, as far as I could see. Knowing I just got there, but I could pretty much read people quick. You know what I'm saying? So bro wasn't it, it's like he didn't give off bad energy at all. So um me and bro chopping it up about real life, chopping it up about different shit. And I'm like, okay, I ain't gonna, you know what I'm saying? I I I think I can manage a little bit. I ain't gonna, I don't think I'm gonna snap. I think I can handle this shit. Um, it's just different shit that I'm seeing though that's kind of still fucking with me. Like, especially, okay, let me paint this picture. Being in the room, I mean being in the uh cell with my celly. First off, how the cell is made is a toilet, it's a bed and a desk. The bed is basically a steel, I want to say like a steel, damn near like a two-story steel desk, and all you got is like fucking mats to sleep on up there. Well, I was on the top bunk, so for one, it ain't even nowhere, no way for you to get up there damn near without almost fucking yourself up because it's sides on there, all of the shit is still, so it's like pressing against your legs and pressing against your hands and or trying to get down. I damn near broke my feet trying to get down because I'm trying to like not jump directly down from the top, but I'm trying to like angle myself a little bit so I could just kind of hang over and then drop. But when I do that, the friction from my feet keep fucking them up every time. So now the top of my feet feeling damn near like it's broke. So I'm like, shit, this shit is not it. Like, it's just different shit that it keeps I keep snapping back into reality. I'm like, damn, I'm really locked up. Like these motherfuckers really got these gates closed, and I can't just as a 34-year-old grown ass man, I cannot walk out these doors when I want to do whatever I want. All because I didn't do what I needed to do with this fucking paperwork. So I'm like, you know what? Let's bring it down, reel it back in. You you you gonna start thinking too much, and you know, you're gonna start tripping. So I'm like, you know what, you right. I'm like, I can't sit here and let myself get to that point. I'm gonna have to, you know what I'm saying, you know, get this shit together. So anyway, let me um stick with this about the the sale or whatever. So on this toilet, like how they got the back of regular toilets inside your house where you lift that thing up, the the cover up on the back of your toilet, and you could, you know, change shit out in the toilet and all that. Instead of it being that, it's a sink. So that's where people making coffee and shit, and this and bro at offer me some coffee. I'm like, this nigga drinking toilet water for real. Or not him, but just everybody that's using this sink is basically using toilet water. I'm like, ain't no way, like, this is insanity to me that I'm experiencing this for real. So I'm just like, you know what? No, I'm good. I'm like, I'm not eating none of this shit. I ain't using none of this shit. I ain't showering, I ain't brushing my teeth, I ain't doing none of this shit. I'm straight. I'm in this bitch funky as fuck. I'm like, I don't get no fucks, though. Y'all gonna deal with this because I'm not showering here, bro. I'm gonna shower when I get home. This I'm not doing this, bro. I'm not about to make this, it's my reality, but I'm not about to try to let this embed into my score because it's already semi-fucking with me. So you got one inmate, the same one my celly telling me about, trying to fuck with everybody, trying to bully the whole deck. It's like, bro, that shit is lame as hell. We in here trying to get in and get out. I'm looking at it like you trying to trick people out their positions, man. Like, you must have way more time than us that you feel like you're gonna try to provoke people to, you know what I'm saying, get get us out our body, and then now we doing more time all because you wanna fuck with somebody. And I'm Pete Bro, he's sizing me up every time I'm on the phone. So I guess he ain't thinking like my thing is I'm not intimidated by that shit because I'm like, yo goofy ass think it's a physical game. I'm knowing life is a is a mental game. So I'm gonna outsmart you because you think you sizing me up without me knowing the whole time I'm sizing you up too. I know that if you put your hands on me, it's gonna go there, but I don't want it to go there because I want to get the fuck out, and I'm knowing all of this, so it's like my mental is just everywhere. I'm like, damn, what if this happened and then I gotta do this and then I gotta do more time, or then they throw my case out and be like, nah, you is aggressive, so yeah, you you stay in here. So I'm like just conflicted. So then I'm preaching to everybody else, like, stop letting these motherfuckers get y'all out your body. Don't pay them no attention. They wanna show. You look them in the eyes, they're gonna feel like you trying them. I'm like, I get as a man, we shouldn't, none of us should feel that like like like we we less than or something, so not look another man in the eye. I'm not telling you don't look him in the eye for that reason. I'm saying just don't give them nothing to talk to you about. Like, just avoid it. Like, because if you sit in there going back and forth, I'm like, bro, you know the type of energy that's gonna come from that. So we in here just you know, talking about this shit, and like, yeah, I feel you, but I'm just my celly, I'm just so fucking tired of it. This this been he been fucking with me for the last week and this and that, and whoop woop woo. And it's so crazy because I noticed, even though he's sizing me up, when I would come out in the hallway with my celly, he would never fuck with my celly. But when I'm back in the room, he jumping on all types of shit with him. And I'm like, bro, just leave him the fuck alone. Like, why man? I hate when people pick on a week. If you want to prove how tough you is, run your goofy ass up to maximum security and go fuck with them like that. Do something so you can get sent to a higher uh level. Don't stay down here with us fucking with all these people in here. That shit lamer than a bitch. So that shit uh that shit kind of blow over a little bit. He trying to go at other people. What set you claim? Woo, why, why, this and that. He checking different people, and it's like, bro, what the fuck? Like, do your time and go the fuck home, bro. You trying to make this bitch your home and try to rule over this motherfucker, bro. That ain't doing nothing, bro. So we get to court and whatnot. We get we get some court time in there. I'm in there waiting, we chopping it up. It's probably I'll say like 15 of us all waiting for court. So many people, but we in there for all damn near everybody in there for different reasons, even when some people in there for traffic violations, it's still different shit, though. So I'm like, it's crazy how all of this in here is set up for you to just be mentally fucked, like, cause nothing you say mattered. If if you think that they don't give a fuck about you on the street, when you behind them bars, you really don't matter at all. You literally they treat you like a literal piece of shit on the ground. Nah, I'ma say it was some cool ass cops in there, no lie. Some of them was helpful as a motherfucker, but that was just the thing. It's either they was cool as fuck or they was straight dickheads. It was no in-between. So it was just like different shit that I'm like, this is really this can't be life for real. This really can't be life. So I'm in there. Um it get to it get to me. I'm chopping it up with one dude, uh, bro, cool as hair, hell, Charlie, and shit. Bro, come from Florida and shit. We chopping it up about our you know, similarities on shit we didn't did, shit, places we didn't work, shit like that. So, you know, everybody in this bitch damn near cool. We all like shit. Good luck on your case, you know what I'm saying? We all damn near like supporting each other through these, you know what I'm saying, situations. So it get on me. I go in the uh zone and whatnot, they like, yeah. Do you know that this is a felony with uh, you know, penalties up to five years in prison. I mean, yeah, in prison. I'm like, wait, what? They like on your first offense, you can still get up to five years. I'm like, ain't no way. I done got pulled over before with my gun on. And they ain't never said nothing about oh, this could be a a felony offense. None of that. They never told me nothing like this. So that's why I'm literally just driving freelancing, not like in a reckless way, but I'm not thinking that if I get pulled over with my gun on me, that I have even a potential to go to jail for one night. Why would I think it's a felony offense up to five years? So I'm just like, this is crazy. So they give me the information, they like, you know, we're gonna try to work with you, get this, you know what I'm saying? If possible, you know what I'm saying? We're gonna, you know, we're gonna just see what can what we can do. I get court dates, I'm like, okay. So everything is still right now in this moment, everything is still up in limbo. I'm like, damn, this this is my reality right now. I'm thinking of everything. I'm thinking about my kids, I'm thinking about their mamas, I'm thinking about my girl, I'm thinking about shit that I had to do, shit that I have to do, shit that I'm supposed to do in the future. I'm thinking about new episodes of pods that I'm supposed to be shooting, new, just everything. I'm like life is just spin, I mean not spinning, but like flashing, like it's different uh situations that I'm thinking about in the moment, and I'm thinking about how life already has been life for a minute, and I'm I'm just like, damn, it really don't stop. But at the same time, I pray that God would give me grace towards myself and mental peace in moments of traumatic experiences throughout you know the rest of my life because I'm like at times I'll be extremely bothered to at a point I have to say something or go off or snap, and I'm like, I hate to be like that. So help you know what I'm saying, heal my mental. And and this situation right here showed me how much he worked he'd been working on me because and how much I've been working on myself because I'm just like I was still peaceful in this moment, even though I felt mentally rattled at points. Overall, I was at peace the whole time I was in there for real, just as a whole, like I wasn't tripping out. I I damn near forgot I had anxiety while I was in there. Because my anxiety used to be bad as hell. So while I'm in there, I like so I used to get my anxiety used to go off crazy in in many different atmospheres, like in the school, in a public setting at a at a game or at a grocery store. So I'm thinking I'm assuming that if I ever got locked up, my anxiety would even go, would go even crazier in that type of setting. No, I was cerebral in there. Like I was I was more so a calming voice for people that wasn't able to, you know, have that mental peace they self. I'm chopping it up with people, they facing years, and some people face, well, I ain't gonna say they facing months, but they been in there for months, like my celly been in there for months and not really getting a clear understanding on if he's gonna get a bond, when he might get a bond, or just what could be the ending result to not like they're not telling him really nothing, so it's just all these situations. Then uh the one of the craziest things, we on lockdown from 10 p.m. to 8 a.m. Meaning you cannot leave your cell at all. Demoralize it. I don't give I don't give a fuck where you came from, I don't give a fuck how tough you is, I don't care how many people you didn't kill, dead, or whatever. I'm just saying to be locked up for 10 hours and not be able to move around is fucking demoralizing. The shit is crazy. If you get used to that, it just means you on that, you know, institutionalized side of shit. I'm not trying to get there. And I'm I'm like, damn, my mind kind of clicking, and I don't want to feel it, but I'm kind of a little comfortable in this bitch a little bit, and I don't want to be. I'm I'm like, I'm me and this bitch uh not only just talking about life, but we laughing, joking, motherfuckers playing cards, dominoes, watching TV on the tablets, um, just different scenarios, and I'm like, I kind of see how people keep coming back to jail a little bit. Not saying that I would want to come back to jail at all, but I'm saying I see how they get comfortable with what's in there. Because if you ain't got nothing to lose for real, or you ain't really got nothing on the outside, you gotta free everything in there. A lot of them don't care about the meals that they getting. So they damn near was gonna eat that type of shit out here. So it's like, hey, what you gonna do? For me, I can't do it. So I stayed away from all that type of shit. Like, as far as the food and shit went, I'm like, I don't wanna be accepting of too much shit in here. If I start utilizing all this shit in here, this shit gonna fuck me up even more. Cause then I'm gonna realize at some point, like I done got way too comfortable in this motherfucker. I'm just, I'm, I'm like, I'm talking to my celly. I'm just, how do you deal with this? As you being a 55-year-old dude, like, how you dealing with this? He like, I ain't gonna lie. It's fucking me up. He like, on top of the fact I'm the one that made a complaint about some shit that was going on, and they got there and took me in. And I just been here ever since. I never been in jail. So he damn near, you know what I'm saying, innocent, and it's like they don't get no fucks. I'm I'm listening to them conversate, I'm listening to certain deputies comp comment like, yeah, fuck your five years, dickhead. I'm like, straight up. Like, that's really how we doing this, like, they really don't give a fuck. And but that's just it's every time I would think about it, I'm like, well, if my shit was together, I wouldn't even be experiencing none of this. So I'm taking full accountability for why I got locked up. The only reason this is even a topic is just really for educational purposes, so other people won't make the same mistake of being ignorant to these laws because something that simple that could have been handled, or I could have just strictly left my gun in the house, and none of this shit never would have transpired, but all because I took it with me and was ignorant to the laws of my CPL, you know, being expired or whatever. Now I'm in this shit. Not a like, yeah, you could be facing up to five years and whoop wop wop, and this and that could happen, and I'm like, I don't want none of it. I don't want probation, I don't want none of it. Like, turn the other cheek for me this time, just one time. Like that hey, I promise you I won't disappoint. Like, I'm not coming back here, like I'm straight. But that's just really not how it works. So then you gotta consider where you at. I'm just I would speak on it, but I ain't gonna put their name out there because I don't want that to then be a target on my back that I done spoke on exactly where the bullshit going down at. But yeah, this shit is so crazy. I'm just like, I'm thinking how so many people out here just jack off their life and be throwing rocks at the penitentiary in the jail and shit. Like it's just sweet. Like it's oh, I'm just going to jail. Yeah, I'm just going to lay down. Like, that shit ain't cool. That shit is not cool. It's not cool to wake up and another man is ass naked in front of you. That's not cool. It's not cool to witness all of the shit that I was witnessing for the couple of days I was in that motherfucker. I'm sitting in here, they got females in here too. I'm in the this on my disc chart on my way out. I'm I'm looking up, I'm like, damn, I know they said the females on the other side of the prison, but how is this dude talking to a female right here on the steps? And she just cheesing and shit, and they just chopping it up. I'm I'm confused as hell. Like, how did she get over here? I look closer. I'm like, that's a whole ass boy. Look straight up like a female. And there's so much shit going on in here. I'm just like, all of this shit is really like making me think about so much shit where it's like I appreciate I was really in there, like, what I would give just to breathe fresh air right now, polluted fresh air, but fresh air though. Like I'm like, I would give anything to just get that intake for real because this is not it. Like, I'm enclosed, I'm just I ain't feeling like myself. I shower every I'm in this bitch funky as fuck. I don't do this. But I'm like, I gotta do what I gotta do. And it's not showering right now. I'm just not doing that in here. Like, I need to get to the crib and take a dog ass shower. A good one. I don't all this extra shit. I'm straight. I'm straight. Um so you know, I'm just chopping it up with different people. Everybody telling me they experiences with shit. And I'm like, damn, so how the fuck did you get to this point? And everybody is in there. Well, I ain't gonna say everybody, but 90% of the people I talked to was in that motherfucker on bullshit. They in there off of traffic violations. They hey and then they it ain't even recent shit. It's all the way damn near 20 years back. Damn near 20 years back. They just nitpicking shit. Yeah, you didn't have a license in 2015 or 2010, and you just did it's like what? Like, how the fuck is you going that far back to one dude say the sheriffs came to his crib and pulled him back up here? I'm like, that shit is crazy. Like, insane. All as many people that was in there, and it was still more as we as they transferring us to different units, they just still filling up the cells right like right below us. So in the midst of us being in court and shit like that, I'm chopping it up with some of the other inmates, and they all, yeah. I just got here, or I just got here a couple hours ago. They all in the holding sales now. I'm like, damn. So when they moved us, they must have brought y'all in. This shit is crazy. I'm like, all this shit is crazy. How they are playing this game. I'm really thinking, like, why they don't just, if you really want people in jail that bad, why don't just pick up all the homeless people that really need a place to stay? And they need the free food and the you know, showers and you know the bit just everything that they providing for people that really is lowering their standards to be there. Why y'all won't just pick up people that need that actually need this shit? Or fig not not have them as prisoners though, but like make it some way that y'all finesse the system anyway. Why not make it some way that they can just you know still make the$1500 per bed or whatever that they making off of us? Why y'all can't figure out a way to do that with homeless folks? Why you gotta put us behind bars over some real goofy stupid ass shit? Then they telling me, oh yeah, you could pay to get your gun back, and this and that. So why the fuck am I going through all of this if I could just pay to get my gun back anyway? All this shit is crazy, it's like a real money grab. Like, this shit is crazy scam type shit. I'm just not understanding, like, how the fuck do how is this shit even legal? But don't nobody give a fuck. It's like you supposed to be here to serve, protect, and serve the people. But y'all rather turn us into criminals. That shit is wild as hell. And at no point do they give a fuck about your mental health. They gon' fake it like they do. They gon' say, do you have thoughts of suicide or anything? You know what I'm saying? You think about harming anybody else or yourself and all that. They gon' fake it like they give a fuck, but no. They no, it ain't no genuine care in this motherfucker, ain't no genuine love, ain't none of that shit. It's all business. They don't want you to take it personal, even though that you know you getting treated like shit majority of the time. It's just crazy. They one dude they tell him he flushed the toilet, it overflowed. They tell him, yeah, now you have a felony for destruction of property. What? Or because they say he the last one to use the toilet, he ain't put shit in the toilet or nothing, he just flushed it. He said it was already something in there, so he flushed it before he could use it. He said, as soon as he flushed it, it started overflowing. Felony. How? How? They say if you break anything, destruction of property, I damn near didn't want to fuck with the tablets. I'm like, what if this bitch slip out of my hand then you try to charge me with some more shit from from some shit that was an accident, you know what I'm saying? Like this shit is crazy as hell. And I'm just like, for me to be on that side, I just couldn't. I was still at a place where I was just like mentally, how am I you know what I'm saying? Dealing with this. I'm dealing with it, but I'm I'm like, damn, I must really heal the lot. I must really have true peace, all this shit. Because how the fuck am I dealing with this shit? This is madness in this bitch for real. Like, straight chaotic. Like, I ain't never I I thought I knew how it would probably feel to be locked up, but actually being locked up is something completely fucking different. Like, it ain't even the people that I'm thinking about, it's just the simple fact of trying not to allow your mind to feel caged in. Because you know you already caged in physically. The battle is just about not losing your fucking mind in this bitch. Don't lose that battle. I think I did pretty good. Um I just I need to spread awareness just because I don't want other people to just like I said before, have that ignorance with this, with these laws. And then it's not even just this law, it's all laws, like the system.

SPEAKER_01 51:14

Huh? The system in general.

SPEAKER_00 51:16

Oh yeah, yeah, bro. It's it's like this whole shit. It's really a shit show. It's really a shit show, and I'm just like, bro, we can't do this shit.

SPEAKER_01 51:29

I think it's interesting because like my uncle, my uncle, when he was I believe he was 16, he did um 15. Yeah, at a young age. Yeah, and um I remember when we went to go pick him up, and I think it was Jackson. And um he was out for a good minute, a good minute. And on some like getting into a fight with his cousin, and this is how I believe the story went, but he got into a fight with his cousin over a female. They were they had a little tussle. And my uncle is is about six, two, six, three, he's tall, and he real, he's real stocky, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, so his cousin is probably average height, my height, your height, whatever. You know what I'm saying? They get into a tussle over uh, you know, the female, and he was holding his, I believe his keys and his cigarette. His cousin was holding it for him before they fell out. He he gets the keys and his cigarettes off of him after he didn't knock them out. He didn't knock this, knock the cousin out. He lay in there on the ground, he didn't win and got his keys and his cigarettes out. Okay. Cousin obviously ended up pressing charges, whatever. But the way they spun it was because I think um one, it was aggravated assault. Two, I think because at that time my uncle either did or didn't, I'm not sure if he did have a gun or not, but either way they they ended up charging for robbery. Even though it was his stuff he took off of.

SPEAKER_00 53:26

Yeah, because he went in his pocket.

SPEAKER_01 53:28

Because he went in his pockets.

SPEAKER_00 53:29

Right.

SPEAKER_01 53:29

So it was a whole robbery, you know what I'm saying? Um, he ended up doing another 20.

SPEAKER_00 53:34

Damn.

SPEAKER_01 53:36

And um it was one of those things, you know what I'm saying? He ended up getting out earlier than the 20, but um I've always been like amazed at the idea, like, bro, how do you do 15, let alone go back and have to do basically another 15? You know what I'm saying? Like, and it was crazy because the prosecutor who got him, he was 16, was the same prosecutor again when he was older. Same dude. So it was almost as if this prosecutor is out to get me. How do you get the same prosecutor? You know what I'm saying? Yo. So then um, you know, he ended up having stuff where like he was, my mom had to help him a lot. Like she was while he was locked up, she's doing his appeals. You know what I'm saying? Everything, trying to get all types of stuff, you know what I'm saying? And then while he in there trying to get his appeals, yeah, he getting into it where you know he got into like a little incident with uh a Mexican person, I believe, Spanish person part of this game. And he had ended up like transferring jails because his life was in threat. Because, like you say, the incident of you trying to bully check me, Mongo, one of those, again, he's 6'3, you know what I'm saying, 200 and something pound, like he's not no dude, you go punk. So yeah, and he got a bad attitude, so you you you mess with him, he go give it to you. So now just giving it to you out of the fact that you tried to come after me, yeah. Now I gotta transfer jails because you got a whole slew of people behind you. Yeah, and if I stay here, I'm cooked, right? You know what I'm saying? So it's like those small things, man. Like you you you like you say, you don't know until you get into that world where it's like, bro, it's another atmosphere inside these jails. And it's crazy because like you say, for traffic violations, other stuff like that, it's like, bro, this it as a black man in America, you have to tow, you're literally towing the line between free and not free. Man, just on the grounds of whether or not, like you say, did I get my paperwork, like uh for your CPL. Like one night, me and Sean driving, I accidentally went down the one way, you know what I'm saying? Because um I had mistaken the street for the other street. I was supposed to go down two blocks, I went down the first block. I'm pulled over, and they oh, you got a license woo-doo woo-do-woo, you know, access where we're going and stuff like that. But just uh, as we driving off, it's like bro, if I didn't have my my my if I didn't have a clean record, if I didn't have my insurance, if it was just a day late, you know what I'm saying, like a this, that bro, we we cook like that fast. It's like we total line every day between free and not free just on the grounds of are you keeping up with your shit enough to not let them have any reason whatsoever to um stop you and and keep you, you know what I'm saying? So it's like the mental fortitude and gymnastics it takes to always basically have to total line of being perfect because the the one off chance that you might not have, you might not be perfect, that could be it. And then not only that, you get thrust into a world that's not the one that's on the outside. Like you think, okay, it's violence out here, it's gangs out here, you know, it's it's people wildin' outside. It's a no-host bar match in jail.

SPEAKER_00 57:20

Facts.

SPEAKER_01 57:20

It's it's a hell in a sale, basically. And you in there with Undertaker and Kane.

SPEAKER_00 57:24

With the guy and Brock Lesnar. Brock Lesnar?

SPEAKER_01 57:27

Everybody, you know what I'm saying? Like Stone Cold, they all and so it's like, bro, you you it's and it's crazy, like you say, bro, one little thing can change everything, bro. I remember I was uh I was on uh college grounds, bro, yeah, by EMU. I don't even at this point in time, I'm not, I don't even smoke. Yeah, my roommate. And again, you you start tracing stuff back, and you start like going from the actual incident, you trace it back to like how it even you even got there. Yeah, because I'm sure you did the same as far as like, yeah, I'm here when you start tracing back, like from the moment it expired to that whole year lapse, you'd like thinking like all the times I could have, and oh I blew it off this time, or I ain't oh what it was the cheese. Okay, I was focused on this. You start tracing that line back, like seeing like how you got to that point. It's like, bro, I I'm in, I don't smoke, but I left this roommate of mine who didn't have a place to stay, stay in my dorm room. And I was in one of those dorm rooms where it's almost like a mini apartment, and everybody got it's four rooms, four bedrooms. It's supposed to be two people per bedroom.

unknown 58:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 58:34

And so you get about what eight people in an apartment. When I got there, I got lucky because it was only like four Arab dudes sharing the room, two rooms. And then the other two rooms was one was mine and the other one was just empty. The person never came for that room, and they never gave me a roommate. So I had a whole room to myself, and it was a whole room that was just unoccupied. Homeboy of mine didn't have a place to stay. I was like, you can take that room. Like, ain't nobody in there, you know what I'm saying? Trying to be cool. Bro was a weed head though. So one night I'm gone. I'm at church, and I get back, my pastor dropped me off. It's like nine at night. And as soon as I walk in the building, I can smell the weed. Yeah. But you don't know where it's coming from in the apartment. So I'm like, whatever. I go in my apartment, I can still smell it, but I'm like, okay, whatever. I'm talking about as soon as I close the door, I ain't I just walked in. Didn't not even bag over the shoulder still, closing the door. As it's closing, I feel the knocking of somebody pushing on it. I'm like, what? I opened the door, it's the cops. I'm like, hey? You know what I'm saying? What's up?

unknown 59:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 59:43

They like, yeah, we gotta call for the disturbance of weed, woo-doo woo doop. I'm like, yeah, I smell it in the in the building, yeah. He like, yeah, we we heard it was coming from this building, from this room. I'm like, I just got here. So, and ain't nobody here. So I don't know if it was from here or not, but I'm like, y'all can, you know, y'all can come in, ain't nobody here, I just got here. Right, mind you, I had on the way back to my dorm, I had fell asleep in the car. So I'm waking up eyes red because I was sleep the entire time.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:16

Right.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:16

So they come in, school, they're like, yeah, you know, your eyes a little red. Again, tone the line just between having to be perfect. Bro, I just woke up, I just got dropped off. I was at church all day. You know what I'm saying? I'm tired, you know what I'm saying? I just got here. They're like, oh, okay. They're like, well, this is a warning. Just to let you know. This is a warning. I was like, I'll let my roommates know. I don't even smoke. Tell them like I don't even smoke, but I let my roommates know. You know what I'm saying? I put the world out. They're like, all right. They leave. That little incident turned into me being expelled from college because they blamed it on me. They pinned it on me. I was the only person there. My roommate didn't get pinned on, he didn't get pinned on him, other dudes that didn't get pinned on them. It only got pinned on me. I got expelled from school. I ended up being on academic probation. I ended up having to go to a drug abuse substance class for like eight hours or something like that. I'm in a class. I'm kind of like you, like they, I'm in there. Just because I've got accused for it, I don't even smoke. The other people in there for real. This girl, she got caught driving with X amount of weed on her, this one. You know what I'm saying? All these people in here for real weed issue. I'm like, I don't even smoke. I'm just in this class because I gotta be here.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:43

Right.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:44

But I had to pay a fine, I had to do this, I had to do that, I had to fight for my reputation to get back into school.

unknown 1:01:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:50

All because of that. And it's like those moments, man, where you you realize, like, man, it's just it only takes one blink of a second for something to change.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:02

Facts.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:02

And everything that you was normal now becomes abnormal because now you you're dealing with a whole new can of worm. So it's like, you know what I'm saying? Even for you to like, and again, just like bro, think think like you saying, like, as I'm listening to you to the story, you know what I'm saying? And that's why I wanted to wait before I said anything, because I want you to get the whole thing out. Yeah, it's like, bro, to to even your mental of your day-to-day, everyday life, what you experience, what you don't experience, and then you get put into a situation where you're not even in there 24 hours and you already seeing homosexual behavior. Man, hey, for real, bro. Off the cut, like, how often on the day-to-day do you even have to experience that? Man, but within 24 hours, you already having to witness that invasion of privacy. You said my man's right here taking invasion of privacy. You know what I'm saying? Like, the level of trauma, bro, that you you you have to, and that's why I'm like, for my even for my uncle, I'm like, how did you do 15 and 15 of that? You know what I'm saying? Like, so it's like, bro, it it's crazy because again, jail is a business, they make money off of it like it's nothing. You'd be, and I'm sure you're saying, like, you say you was only there three days, and then you seen people come in, it's like you'd be surprised how many people are getting locked up every day. Yeah, that's just one jail, bro. On on one jail on a cycle, yeah. And you realize it's like, bro, people really getting locked up because one, our lack of knowledge and our lack of understanding that this system had already been in place before we got here to derail us. Facts. You say like they supposed to protect and serve. When you think about police, the originating creation of the police was to track and hunt down slaves, what? Slaves.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:58

So they were never even meant to protect and serve us, right? Right, nah, for real. So even in the the illustration of how they the the police force has developed over time, it still was never a system or a force that was created to protect us as a people. Right. And who's the most people that goes to the jail? Us.

unknown 1:04:24

Man.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:25

And it's because we we we don't have, and I don't want to make it sound like we should have some type of respect for the law, even though you should, but I'm saying like it's because we don't respect the law, we don't respect the rules, we don't know the system, we don't know the rules. You you like bro, I didn't even know that was up to five years. It's like who even when you say like the other you didn't got stopped a thousand times. If our job is to catch you slipping that one time, why would I tell you the heads up? Right. I'm gonna let you go. And and and it not this time. It's almost like when when you know, you've seen in in movies or in documentaries or anything where you know the the the black guy escapes some kind of white force or oppression. Yeah. But they say, I see you next time. Yep. And why do they say that? Because they like you got me on this one. But they still they already know they just waiting on the next one. So it was just like, bro, it's it's insane, bro, how that happens. And and even when you think about the system in which you was in there, my man, bullying people, it's like instantly we go from a society of free normal people to creating hierarchies in prison. The moment you get there, it's like now I gotta size up. Yeah. Because there's a there's a pecking order now that has to be in place because when you put that many people in a room, someone has to be king, someone has to be the jester, someone has to be the chef. Like everybody. Has to start then taking their role in packing order. Yeah. You don't have to, but that's the mindset that they want. And like you say, man, Willie, you you get into a fight now, you got another five, you didn't add on time. You break the toilet, add on time. You know, you you drop your plate, your meal, add on time. Because once we got you in there, our goal is to keep you in there. So every little thing is gonna be. I I equate it, I equate it to um, this is gonna sound crazy, but I equate it to, you know, in wrestling, there's this thing where uh wrestlers who were wrestling for this company, AEW wrestling, um, they would have a contract, right? You I signed, you know, let's say WWE, I signed five years with WWE at the end of those five years, but this was in AEW. At the end of those five years, my contract is up. I'm a free agent now. Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Remember those six months you took when you injured your knee and you was out for six months? Yeah, we need you to stay on contract for six more months. But my contract is up. Yeah, but see, now that we got you, remember all those little things? Oh, you took that six month injury for your knee. Yeah, we need you, you're not really, you off contract, but you're not off contract because we go, we go, we need those six months as well. Yeah. And wrestlers was looking crazy, like, what? If my contract is up, it's up.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:26

They like, no, no, no, no, no.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:29

That injury six months that you was off, we want you to actually give us that back. So sit on the contract for six more months. And wrestlers who was ready to jump ship couldn't. They had to stay under the company. Barely, I don't even think they were getting paid because now your contract is up, but you we still need you on contract to give us back that six months. Basically, because like you say with the toilet, now that we got you here, yeah, every little thing you've done in these five years, if you took two weeks off, six months off, we no, your contract just ain't up. You about to back pay us and staying on contract. So it's like, bro, it's the same thing in prison, man. Like, they will find a way to try to keep you in there because the longer you stay, that bag goes up. Facts. That funding goes up. You know what I'm saying? And you really become like you say, um, an animal uh uh out the pasture, basically. You just like you, you know, when you look at a farm and you see animals herded up, you know, put all into a cage, it's like, bro, it it is it's sickening, it's it's it's sad, it's depressing, um, and it's scary, bro. Because like I like you said, I just got stopped. And granted, yeah, you know, you like you say, okay, I could have uh, you know, have my paperwork in order. But as cool as a cop can just say, hey man, get on, get that together and let you go. Right. It's as quick as another one to say, got them. Like you say, they high five. Man. They cheering each other. Hey, you you got them with no paperwork? Oh, and granted, I understand to a degree in this society where we do have a lot of young people, a lot of people out here with guns, unlicensed, untraceable, killing people, hurting people, murdering people. I understand the severity of like, we gotta catch those people. Yeah. But at the same token, there's a thin line between wanting to catch people who are truly out here doing who need to be caught, yeah, and then uh harassing people, targeting targeting people along the way. Me and Sean was downtown one night, man, just chilling. Chilling, bro. We we was over by the water, yeah, and we own uh by the by the mail post office downtown, and it's a strip of street where everybody used to park their cars along the street, you know what I'm saying? And you just chill there. And so we outside standing outside our car. And it's a row of cars. It's not like we the only one, it's a row of cars. And the boys drive by and I made direct eye contact with the driver. And he stared at me until they couldn't see me, and they kept going. I said, Sean, bro, they about to turn around. I said, get ready. He said, Man, no, they're not, bro. They then drove off. I said, bro, they they go looping around. He like, alright, sure enough, they hit the loop, they passed every single car on the way back, they stopped right by mine. They like, um they rolled down the windows. My man's on the passenger side now, cause the driver's on the other side. So the passenger, he leaned out, the window, the dude on the back side, he rolled down the window, AR, just sitting there. And he like, uh, he like, y'all good? They like, yeah. He like, you ain't got no guns on y'all, do y'all? I said, no, sir, I don't even like guns. Because again, not that I wouldn't have one of my own. Yeah. I have to say this. Just so y'all know I'm not playing with y'all. I don't want to make it seem like because if I get, I wanna, I'm gonna tell my wife, like, we need to buy something. But I'm not saying this to you. Right, right. I'm talking to you as if I distaste them. Sir, I hate them. Right. Because I'm playing, like you say, it's it's the mental game. Yeah, it's a mental game. So I'm telling him, like, bro, sir, I don't even, I don't even like guns. I don't, I'm not a fan of 'em. So he like, what's that right there? There ain't no uh what's that a Smith and Weston right there? Now instantly, uh, I'm already knowing, oh y'all trying to get us to move. Even the slightest move. My man is in the backseat holding the AR. Clear as day. Like he's ready to up and aim. We are not about to move a inch, bro. I said, ain't no Smith Weston on me. He said, that ain't no Smith and Weston. Oh yeah, what about that? What's that? That ain't no Glock right there. Sean said, What you he had his ear pods hanging from his belt. He said, What you mean? I said, Sean, don't move, bro. I said, we ain't got no guns on us, sir. He ain't got no gun. I don't have no gun. We there's no guns on us. We're not moving to look for whatever you I'm not gonna acknowledge that. If I start looking, then you like, oh, see, you must have. No, no, no. We're not moving because there are no guns. We're not moving an inch to look down. You talking about something, is that a Smith Way? The moment I look down, I've already conceded that I have one. No, right? I'm not moving, I'm staring you straight in the eyes and telling you, sir, we do not have any guns. He like, um, he like, he like, my bad. Well, our our gun, the gun, our gun radar just went off when we passed y'all cars, so you know I'm saying, y'all, y'all, y'all have a good night, though. Y'all be alright. And he he cracked some joke about something, I don't know, his he said something about his girl or his wife, whatever. And then they drove off. I said, bro, I said, that was a whole trap right there. That was a whole trap right there. It's we are literally one of like 30, 40 cars on this street. Everybody sitting in their cars, there's people standing outside, and y'all chose us. And you thought we was gonna move, or the moment you pointed out something, you thought we was gonna run. Bro, we were, my man's had the gun ready in case we y'all thought we was go up or something. Like, man. I said, bro, in that moment I just knew, like, man, it's crazy how I have nothing on me. And here I am having to justify my own freedom, my own citizenship or or or legalism to these officers that are trying to probe to see if I use it. Oh yeah, my gun radar went on. What radar? Man. What radar? If you have one, then it's broken because there's no gun here. Right. Either that or you just lied to me. How do I supposed to accept that as a as a citizen that pays my taxes, do everything the right way, and I'm getting harassed for having something that I don't even have? And potentially looking at being shot because you literally have a gun AR stick. It's like, bro, that's crazy. Was it your people or was it some other people? The one who was talking to us trying to see if we had the gun was our people. The one that had the the AR was not our people. He was fair-skinned people. Man. And it was crazy. Because, like you say, bro, they don't care. They talk to you however. It's crazy how officers who are supposed to be a representation of something, they talk to they talk to everyday human beings like we nothing. And don't get me wrong, I I I can understand how on their on their side of the fence, when they deal with maybe belligerent people of all kinds every day, how your your heart can be hardened, your view of the world can be shaped and crooked because you're seeing the worst of people every day as a cop. You know what I'm saying? Like, that's why I tried to say to people, like, I don't necessarily be having nothing against them in a sense because I don't deal with having to you know handcuff this person and they fight resistant or whatever. I hey bro, that's a whole nother field that y'all that's a whole nother level of stress y'all deal with. But right, the way that y'all allow it to make you feel like now that's every person you come into contact with, and we all get the same energy. I'm getting the same energy as a convicted felon, man who didn't probably, like you say, pieced up his girl X, Y, and Z. And I'm just trying to go to the grocery store, and you treat me like y'all been looking for me for years. You know what I'm saying? Like that's crazy, and and it's a traumatizing thing to have to experience. Um, and it's crazy, bro. Um again, my mind is just blown, bro. That you know what I'm saying, you even had to experience that. But it it lets me know, bro, that when we are in seasons in our life when we are elevating to new heights, when when when God is really preparing us for the next new chapter in our life, there are forces in this world that strictly are prepared to stop you from getting to that next level. You know what I'm saying? And with you doing this pie and the success it's been having with you and this this new, fresh, and healing relationship that you're in with your girl, um, and everything that you've been doing for yourself, the work you've been doing, even eating differently, creating a whole new mindset with that. Like you're you're breaking into a new season of your life, you know what I'm saying? And you're coming out of the traumatizing, chaotic season that you were in for so long. And the forces, that's why I say, you know, it's not so much that it's just quote unquote police, it's like we talk about energy, the forces that be that are at play are trying to stop you from getting to that next level. Because that next level, there's no chaos in that level, there's no there's none of that extra stuff that you've been dealing with. But if we can bring you back down, like crabs in a barrel, we can bring you back into chaos. That if you have that peace, if I can take that peace back, if you got joy, we can take that joy back. Because see, bro, you next year, yeah, everything, bro. When you was talking about the the the years of chaos, bro, we we know where your mind was at, right? We know where the stress was at, we know where the anxiety was at, we know where the mental was at. When you breaking into new levels, bro, it's new it's things that are trying to get you to stay. Don't leave us. It's like when your kids like, daddy, don't go. Yeah, those forces, those evil forces are saying, Don't leave us. What you want peace for? No, no, no. Remember, remember the stress. They want to bring you back, bro. Yeah, and everything you've been doing that's been that's been flourishing, bro, is only showing like you you got your hand on the door opening to a new season, but there's so many things behind you, evil-wise, that's like, no, we gotta get him. You gotta get and they will do it by any means necessary. Any means, bro. I will say it, and the only reason I say it is because you know, my wife and I, we we've been in a whole new season of our marriage, bro. We we went through a three-year war, I say, with each other. We was beefing for about three years, you know what I'm saying? And you know, we we were on the verge of like divorce and everything. We was in a very bad space, yeah. And I was like, man, you know, God did a great thing where he healed our marriage, and we literally the moment we kind of chose January, it was January of last year, we chose each other in the in a very critical moment in conversation we had, we chose each other. Yeah, and we started to see from January to April, because this there's a thing that happened from January to April, we started to see things just get better with us, right? We started we started to get back to where we was at, we started breaking through a new level. Yeah, and there was a person who I was let stand with me. Um a friend I was trying to help out, a friend I was trying to support, and as they were getting ready to move out, you know, we like, okay, cool, that's great. We we've been working on us, this is a great time. They about to move out. We we have our house again, it's just gonna be us. And right before they left, they did the most egregious, heinous thing ever. They accused me of essay on the way out, and we had been again, we had been beefing for three years, so in those three years, I wasn't the most best person or my best self. And that person knew that. And they told my wife everything. All the dirt that I had done, all the shortcomings I had, they just she tried to tried to tell her everything ruined everything we had just broken into this new fresh step for. Right. And she she came and was like, yeah, let me try to curveball all of that. And if it wasn't for the fact that we recognized that this was the enemy at play, bump the person.

SPEAKER_02 1:20:48

Right.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:48

We recognized that this was the enemy at play trying to stop this fresh thing that God was doing for us. If we wasn't, if we didn't recognize that, we wouldn't have made it to now. But because we were, our eyes were awakened and we had already come back to each other when it happened. She was like, my wife looked at me and was like, I know you didn't do it. I know who you are. We go fight this, we go, but at the same token, I'm I'm in your situation where I'm like, bro, I might go to jail for this. I'm being accused of this. I I don't I don't even know where to start with an accusation like that. I don't even know how to who do I call? I'm like, do I get a lawyer? Do I do I put out defamation of care? Like, I don't I've never dealt with anything like this. What I my mind was like, bro, I you know what I'm saying? I'm I'm getting like threats in my home. I'm I've never had a chaotic season like that in my life. Yeah, it was the first of its kind. I'm I'm moving my family out the house. We on the technically, we on a run because I can't have us at home because people quote unquote looking for me, trying to defend this person who they feel has been violated. Woo-doo. I'm like, bro, what? How? Like, I'm literally like you like, how did I get here, bro? Man. And if it we it was a season of me just being in prayer, me being, man, I like that that pocket journey of like me and God, bro. It was like I had to literally hone in on him. But I say all that to say is like when these seasons happen to us, where we are facing unspeakable challenges, it's only because we are about to get into, we're we're headed towards an unspeakable season that we're about to walk into. And everything you've been talking about, man, having the deals, and you're talking about the success for your pie, you've been talking about um what you want to see for yourself, your family, bro. It's like that's not just because you're saying it, bro. That's because it's about to happen. Right, right. No, for real. So it's like this this stuff here, bro, is a this is literally your Goliath now. This is your Goliath. And when you see people afraid, like you saw people in the prison, you just gotta know how to gather your stones. Right. So you can slingshot this Goliath and take it down, bro. And so, you know, I encourage you, bro, to be at peace knowing that one, this is not just by happening chance, and yet there's a lesson in learning, like, as a black man, stay on top of your shit, right? Yeah, cross the board, true, but at the same token, it's not the physical, it's the spiritual, bro. Yeah, and this is really something trying to derail you from the path that you're on, it's trying to get you to start being like, maybe I shouldn't be at peace. Maybe I shouldn't have. And like you say, you was holding on to it the entire time. But guess what that those three days was trying to do? Still it back.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:03

Oh, yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:04

It was trying to take it back. You feel what I'm saying? So it's like, bro, that that is um, it is it is it it's a one, it's a good thing to even see you down, bro, because the crazy part about even this is unless I go on Facebook and see the message or uh the post you made, bro. I didn't even know. Right. I'm in my mind, like, bro, you're not gonna buy Sunday. You know what I'm saying? I'm like, yeah, so bro, it's like that fast, bro. We can just disappear out of people's lives off of the most smallest things, and nobody would ever know. So it's like, bro, it's good to even see you now on the other side of it, bro. But just be encouraged, man. Like, know that this is literally trying to derail your progress. It's all about your progress. If you're not, bro, I always tell people, the devil not gonna bother you if you're not, if you ain't doing nothing. That's why when people always like, bro, what's going on with this? Why the devil? Because you doing something. Facts. You on the path to something, you growing, you changing, you developing. Facts. If he not messing with you, that means you want to hear his. Right. Hey. That means that mean you with him, and he like, hey, love, love me some life, one. Love me him. Me and him type. The moment you start being like, yeah, I'm about to start doing better, he's like, ah, hold on, listen, tripping. Man, facts. Let me remind you, bro. Let me get you back. Like, facts. So when you when you facing trials and tribulations, bro, that only means that you you doing the right thing. It means that you're on the path to something. God is getting ready to do something, bro. And he's strengthening you through this experience. And so, you know, don't let it, don't let your good, your hard work be wavered. You know what I'm saying? Don't let this destroy your mental, your growth, your hard work, your progress, your your your inner work, your outer work. Continue to to stand and rise above it, bro. But, you know, continue to always know that, you know, as a black man, bro, you gotta you you gotta be perfect. Yeah. You gotta be perfect. I mean, and black women too, but we we know how they feel about us. Oh, yeah. So it's like, bro, you gotta be perfect. And and that's a stressful thing. You know, I tell my wife all the time, how many times have you passed police and never had to look back? She be like, I don't never think. I'm like, exactly. As a black man, I there's never a time I've never passed a cop car and never looked back.

unknown 1:26:35

Man.

SPEAKER_01 1:26:36

And I'm talking about I'm looking until they become a dot in the rearview. You know what I'm saying? Like, I gotta make sure they gone, gone. You know what I'm saying? So, you know, bro, it's it's it's definitely um a crazy journey and story that you just shared, man. Like, and yeah, I think of my uncle, and I don't even know how he did 15 and 15. Like, I don't know how he even existed in that, you know what I'm saying? Like you say, come out with no damage. And I think he did have damage. I think, you know, he might not speak on it, he might not talk about it. I'm sure there's damage there. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? But for him to not even be like a uh a hateful person or an angry person or just you know what I'm saying, resentful, like he's trying to live his best life. But right, it's like that that type of society, that type of um environment, it's only built to destroy. They always talk about rehabilitation, but it's really about destroying.

SPEAKER_00 1:27:38

Hey man, ain't shit when hey bro, I'm gonna be real with you. Ain't shit rehabilitating about that shit. I promise you was tearing you down. Of course. I promise you was nothing building you up in there. I thought that it was, bro, but it's not. It's really the work you to make you fit think like to never do this shit again or else you gonna get. More of this uh mental lashing. Right. That's really all it is is a mental lashing.

SPEAKER_02 1:28:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:28:06

I'ma whoop your ass for not having your paperwork together. Mentally.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:10

Bro, yeah. If you look at when you look at the school system, you look at the job workforce, it's all prison.

SPEAKER_00 1:28:17

Bro, I just told my celly that, bro. I said all of it is made the same exact way.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:24

It's all a prison.

SPEAKER_00 1:28:25

The blueprint to all these places are exactly the same.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:28

Walking kids walking in a single file line, go to the bathroom one at a time, you know, don't raise your hands, don't speak without like all that stuff sitting in in small rooms, but like populated rooms of kids, but you know, teachers with like 30, 40 kids in their classroom. Like all of that is is is is is all a simulation to showing you what prison is like and and building you up to be able to handle it when you get there. Right. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 1:28:55

If you're not again talling the line right. So being 30 plus at these warehouse jobs or retail jobs, and they telling you you can't chew gum. Like what all of that, bro? What's going on? Like, it's it's weird activity, bro. It is, and it's just bro. I'm a big thinker, bro. I'm a big thinker, so my mind is always going on what is really going on here, right? I start dissecting shit soon as I get on scene. Like, yeah, this ain't really what they said it was. Like, I thought the grass was greener over here, but it's a hella lot of brown patches over there though, bro. Like, look at all these brown patches around here, and it's a lot of cancerous situations involving a lot of cancerous beings. And it's like, bro, to think you don't matter is crazy. But to know you don't matter is even worse.

SPEAKER_02 1:29:57

Right.

SPEAKER_00 1:29:58

Not saying I don't matter to myself or I don't matter at all. No, no, yeah. But I'm saying to other beings you don't matter at all. Like I will smoke you today and not even think twice about it. That type of shit. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:30:11

That's why I was like, when when when when when prisoners who've been in there for a long time get out, like, that's why like one of the things they can tell you verbatim is they number. Yeah. Because that's all they get reduced to. Number 965230. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 1:30:27

Like they get reduced to that number. Bro, I still know my shit, bro. And I just been in there three days. How do I remember all this shit, bro? You feel me? I'm like, bro, I one thing they did let me do. So when I was in there, I don't in the new days, I don't really remember numbers like that. Right. By these cell phones, you just store the number in there and then keep it pushing. So I only really knew my son's mama number and my daughter's mama number by heart. I knew nobody else's number by heart. Right. So they let me go in my phone. I'm like, well, the let me look for the people that I know I'm gonna need to talk to for real. Right. I found my mama number, my girl number, and my best friend number. And I never like remembered they number to the point where I could just dial it. Or check this out, bro. I'm in the back of the police truck. They reciting my girl number to me. They like, do this sound familiar? I'm like, I don't know. Right. Like, I just put the number in the phone and then like, you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_01 1:31:36

I remember when you had to remember people's number. Right. And I was great at that, and now I think I know my mom's number and my girl number, and that's it.

SPEAKER_00 1:31:45

Right. And so with me, I only remembered them two numbers and then my pop's number from way back when. And of course, I could remember all these different numbers I've had, right? But other people, I cannot remember no numbers like that. So, but while I'm in there, I'm reciting this shit. I'm like, I'm gonna remember these. Like, so the numbers that I you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_01 1:32:11

Crazy what your brain can do when you need it to do.

SPEAKER_00 1:32:13

Yeah, so I started remembering the shit, and I'm like, okay, cool. Now I lose this paper, I already know it now.

unknown 1:32:20

Right.

SPEAKER_00 1:32:20

And I'm like, it's crazy that I didn't know it before. Like, I couldn't even identify it if I seen it. So it's just crazy how this shit works, bro. And it another thing is it's so crazy how quick they tell a lie. They let us get our numbers out, then next thing you know, other inmates like, yeah, can I get a number? I don't know how I don't know my people's number by heart. They like, yeah, we can't do that. That's against the law. They just let us do it. So, was it against the law? Well, it wasn't against the law. Now, 20 minutes later, it's a new law.

SPEAKER_01 1:32:54

Like, so it's like, what's really going on here? But it's crazy because that is a that's a mental game, because what happens when that person is sitting next to you and you like, man, they just let us do such and such. How does it make that person feel? Right. So you like, okay, they let y'all do it now. I'm in here and they like, no, you can't do it. And I'm sitting next to you, like, that's crazy, bro. They just let us do. How does that now mess with my psyche? So what does that mean about me? What is that? So do I ever get the you get what I'm saying? It it and do you and then we just created diversity. Because now I'm like, I can feel the way it towards you now, right? You get what I'm saying? It's like, bro, there's there's there's there's studies, bro. There's studies on this, like that one famous movie that they came out with. Um, I can't even think about it. It's so it's called the something experiment. And they actually did like two. Social experiment? I think it might have been a social experiment with the people that was the jail, they created a fake jail, and they had people play prisoners, they had people play guards. And then after a certain time, they had the people who was the guards play the prisoners, and the people who was the prisoners play the guards. And it bro, it was nuts because the people who were the prisoners, they got treated so bold by the by the guards that when they became the guards, they were more vicious than they were. Because they was giving it back. I bet. You get what I'm saying? But it's like, bro, that is not only do they create that within the jail with the prisoners, they create that again with the guards in the prison. Right. And then the prisoners with the prisoners. Right. Because now you got the prisoners who've been there forever. Like you say, I'm I'm in here and I'm messing with the people that just got in because the guards treat me a certain way, so now I treat you a certain way. And then the guards might treat you favor, but then they don't treat them favor. Bro, it's crazy. It's like it it's really insane. You know, they always used, you know, old folks be like, man, it's you know, it's a blessing, is it's a blessing to uh be another day above ground, but it's like it's another blessing to be outside the walls.

SPEAKER_00 1:35:05

Hey, yo, for real. Look, so I I tell my Sally, right? I say, Do you know how easy it is for you to lose your mind, bro? Yeah. He said, Yeah, I'm I'm trying not to right now. I'm like straight face. I'm like, bro, I feel you, bro. I'm like, I'm practicing my piece because they wondering, how is this my first go round? And I'm so calm. I'm not complaining, I ain't scared, I ain't right. They like, it seemed like you've been here, but the way you talk, it's like you don't belong here though. But that's what I'm saying, bro.

SPEAKER_01 1:35:44

Like, that's why I was telling you about the work you've been doing. Imagine, bro, think of how small, like you might have been like, I just went vegan, or I just been practicing my piece, or you know, me and my girl, we just mad woo-woo. All this bro, but think how those small moments over the last year have played a role in for these three days. If you are still Elijah Wan in a state of chaos when you go in there, you cooked mentally. Hey, fat, I told them that. So, like, all the work you've been doing, bro, has prepared you even for that moment, bro. And and it reminds me, you know, biblically it reminds me of Paul. You know what I'm saying? When Paul got arrested and went to prison, like, he was just chilling. Yeah. And people in there was like, you ain't, you ain't, and he like, bro, I'm good. Like, gotta be what do. But it's like, bro, imagine if you don't do that work. Whenever you decided to do that work, it's like you don't, you don't even have it for you today. Bro, you know what I'm saying? So it's like it just shows you, bro, the small things we decide to do, the small changes we decide to do. It's not just because you chose to do it, it's because you needed to do it because something was on the way. Right, facts. You know what I'm saying? So it's it's an iHeart deal. But listen, okay? And it's crazy because bro, I remember my mom put me in a home one time, bro. I was, you know, I was like 14, 15, I was acting up in school. You know, again, this is during the time I'm telling you, I'm fighting my pops and all this other stuff. So you know, so she does it, yeah. I'm acting out, and yeah, she probably can guess why, but it didn't, you know, she just had random course with my behavior. So she had put me in this home. And like prison, bro. I'm trying to tell you. I go to this home, bro. And she didn't drop me off. They didn't did all this paperwork on me. And my mom didn't tell me that she was only putting me in there for like two weeks. She basically did it like she dropped me off and was like, bye. So I'm like, I'm in this thing. I'm in here for a minute, minute. And again, other kids come. I was the only kid there for a minute because the other kids had been gone to skating or bowling or something. When they come back, bro, I'm in there. I'm literally in there because I have some I got some bad grades because I got a little attitude. Right. Bro, I'm in there with kids who got real issues. Yeah. Like, it was a it was a Spanish girl there, very pretty girl. Yeah. My first instinct, I'm like, hey, I'm about to try to holler at this Spanish girl in his mind. Since I'm about to be in here. She cuts herself. She in there because she's cutting herself. I'm like, oh. I've never met a kid that cut themselves. What are you talking about? Who kids do that? My roommate, he's like 4'11. Little dude. He in there because he done beat his mama up. Man. I'm like, yo. These kids in here on some real bro, real bad kids, bro. So when we in like our group counseling, they like, yeah, you know, I'm in here because it's such and such. Another kid, I'm in here because it's such and such. They get to me, I'm like, I got an F in math. Man. I don't belong with y'all. That's crazy. Like, you have some violent kids, and I'm in here because I got an F, bro. And like you say, bro, we had sundown at eight. No, son, I mean 10? Yeah. Until 8, bro. I'd never we had a bunk bed, like you say, little thin cotton at boy. Man. Little sheet cover. No, and a desk. We ain't had no TV or nothing. Bro, I've never I've never not known what to do from 10 to 8 with no like nothing.

SPEAKER_00 1:39:43

Man. And you hey the worst part, bro, you don't have a clock, so you don't know what time it is from 10 to 8. So I went, I went to sleep, bro, after lockdown. It may have been around 11 or 12ish, right? So I'm thinking I've been asleep for a minute. So I wake up, remind you, I'm on the top bunk. So it's a window, a small ass window right there. I'm looking out the window. I'm like, hell yeah, at least I can see some shit. But then I realized all I'm seeing is the top of the prison. I'm like, dog, this barb wire and shit depressing, bro. Like seeing that. So I had to turn over, bro. I had to. I was cool as long as when it was time for lockdown, I slept with the cover over my head. Because I normally wake up and my eyes is wide open, and I'm like, I don't want to see that I'm in jail the first thing I see when I wake up. I rather see a blue sheet. I'd rather see this blue sheet than that be the first thing I see.

SPEAKER_01 1:40:46

That's crap. See, you know what I'm saying? Thoughts like that, bro. Man. Thoughts like that. Like, bro, it it That's why I was like, bro, when I was in this home, I'm like, bro, I I I genuinely didn't understand how I even could see myself being like, these kids have been there forever. Yeah. I'm like, this is wild. Y'all kids are violent, crazy. I have F's, bro. I'm not, it's like, bro, I'm not supposed to be here. Right. Like my our therapy sessions ain't the same. Like these kids throwing plates at each other when they they don't want to do this. The people in the in the home gotta like tussle with them. I'm like, yeah, I got I'm going back to my room, or what that like, bro. It it is so so again, bro. That that experience is mind-blowing. And it's why I be telling cats, like, is that stuff y'all doing out here really worth it, bro? Man, a fact. Driving with no L's, no insurance, drop, you know what I'm saying? Do all this other wild stuff y'all doing, y'all. Is it really worth it, bro? Facts. Is it worth getting and and and and I seen somebody that I know recently said they was about to sit down and have to do some time. And they just like, yeah, you know, I'm about to do this, woo-doo woo-doo woo, knock it out. I see y'all on that. I'm like, man, is it that normal? Like you you just cool with it, man. Like, I don't understand, man. Like, I don't understand how people justify being in there or celebrating it. Like they they like about to show the world that they can I'm about to go in here. It's like bro, I I'm not proud if I'm going in there. I'm sad. So bro, I I'm I'm I'm I'm bro. I'm so glad you, you know what I'm saying, you home, man. You you know what I'm saying? On your T Grizzly, you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 1:42:40

You know what I'm saying? You need to drop a track now, you know what I'm saying? Hey, I'm like, I gotta do a first day out pod. That's why I say, bro, I had to hit you up, bro. Soon I I already said it when I was in there. I said, bro, this is too much to unpack. So I gotta drop a pod on this shit, bro. Like, this is too, this for one, this is shit we all need to have knowledge about. This ain't shit about just really kind of exposing them. It's more so like we need the knowledge so other people other people don't fall down that same path of ignorance that I fell down. That's that's really what it's about. And I'm just like, like I tell them, even when I'm in the back of the truck, bro, I'm taking accountability on the whole ride there. Even though y'all pulled me over for some bullshit, I'm like, I ain't tell them they put me over for some bullshit because I'm not trying to compound my issues. Of course. But mentally I'm thinking that. But I'm I'm telling them as we're on our way. I said, it's y'all's job to catch me lacking or anybody lacking, and it's my job and anybody else's job to not have y'all catch us lacking. So it's not y'all fault. I ain't mad at y'all. I said, that's why I'm not tripping on y'all. I hate that I'm going to jail, but I live in reality. I don't live in my emotions. So I can't be mad at you for some shit that I could have corrected before it ever got to this point.

SPEAKER_01 1:44:11

Right.

SPEAKER_00 1:44:11

Yeah, it's fucked up. It had to go up and go down like that. I I met some cool ass people in there, but I'm like, I hate that that's how I had to meet them.

SPEAKER_01 1:44:21

For sure.

SPEAKER_00 1:44:22

For sure. I'm telling people on the way out. A couple of us, happy as hell on the way out. I ain't know they got released before I got released, but I see them on the way out. I'm like, shit, hey, that's what's up. I'm pointing at all of them. I'm like, hey, let's not meet up in here again though. You feel me? They like, for sure, we gonna tap in out here. We you know what I'm saying? It just that first gust of wind, bro, that shit was like a hit. Like, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, yo, first blunt, like it's like, damn. Yeah, it's a different different feeling. It was like euphoria, like, what the fuck? I never appreciated air so much in my life, bro.

SPEAKER_01 1:45:05

I don't think we I don't think until you until you you face those type of situations, you you learn to appreciate it. Yes, you know what I'm saying, and you would be a better man and a better father and everything for it. You know what I'm saying? Just because you you will be able to now have a level of severity when you talk to your sons, like, hey, y'all understand. Right. Like, I might have been able, like, I might have been hard on y'all before. I mean even harder now. Because y'all need to understand, like, it's that thin line. So it's, you know, bro, it's it's it's amazing, bro. It's crazy. And and the crazy part is I was at my show tonight. Yeah. I had just got off stage. I'm standing in a crowd. I just casually pull up my phone. I was like, I'm gonna go to Facebook. I don't know why. I don't, I'm not, I'm not a big social media person. I mean, I do it because I have to, but I don't be just scrolling and scrolling and scrolling. Like, you might get two scrolls and I'm off. Yeah. I just happen to go on Facebook. I'm like, oh Facebook, you was the first person on the post on the page. Man. And I just see all caps, right? All caps on this post. I say, bro, don't, again, you rarely post for real. Yeah. So I say, bro, got all caps. I'm thinking, in my mind, I'm like, when I see people post all caps, I'm like, oh bro, snapping on something. Yeah. I'm thinking he like, you niggas really. I'm like, you know what I'm saying? So I start reading it. I'm like, just got out three days, what? I'm like, bro, what? And so not even five to ten minutes, bro. I read that post, I walk out the show, I get in the car. I don't even make it to the first. No, I made it past the first corner, past from the spot I was at, and you call. Yeah. And I'm like, in my mind, I'm like, alright, I can call, bro, when I get, because I was listening to some music. I kind of like to listen to music when I drive. So when people call me when I'm driving, I'd be like, bro, let me call you back. I'm listening to music. Yeah. But and I was tired because I just got off the stage. I mean, I've been there since 8 o'clock. It was now almost 10 o'clock. Right, right. Um, you know, I had performed like, bro, I performed so many songs tonight. And I was tired. So in my mind, I was like, I'm gonna call, bro, when I get home because I'm tired. I just, you know, performing is releasing energy. I'm like, I need to recoup. I'm gonna recoup on this ride home, and then when I settle down, I'm gonna call him. So I'm in my spirit was like, answer the phone. Sure enough, I answered. And then we ended up talking about all this, and now here we are. But it's just like, bro, it's just like, man, that it it again, divine intervention, how that happened. Because right, as soon as I saw the post, I instantly read yours and got right off Facebook. I didn't read nothing else. Normally again, I swipe and just get off. I saw the caps and was like, let me read this. Like I read the first line, which didn't really say too much at first. It's not until you start getting into the meat of that post. I'm good for being like, da-da-da-da. And just forget about it. Yeah, I'm reading that boy, like, oh, oh, oh. I'm like, bro, what the what I done dropped a little hug emoji? Like, I don't like bro, love, bro. Like, man. And then out after that, you not not not even like I say, five minutes, bro. You call and you know, we started talking about it. So it's just like divine, divine intervention. And I think that's why even this moment happened, even just letting you know and encouraging you, bro, about everything. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? Cause it's like, bro, you right there. You know what I'm saying? You right there on the cuffs of like doing great things, and and and you know you've been trying to do this for years. You know, I didn't supported you for years, bro. Like, I ain't never been like, oh, bro, you lazy. Yeah. It's always been, bro, whenever you're ready, you know me. Whenever you're ready, bro. So to see you doing what you're doing now, it's like, bro, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of what you've been doing with this pod and everything. And you right there on the cuffs of doing some great things, bro. Yeah. Like, I'm looking at these numbers, I'm like, bro, getting 20, 30, 40s, listens a pod. I'm over here looking at my little measly 15, like, I gotta do a better pod. What is happening? But I'm just saying, like, it's showing, bro, like, you're doing something that's special. Yeah. Like, you're doing something special. I told my Uncle the same thing. He wanted to do a podcast. He wanted to do a dumb podcast, and I had to correct. That's dumb. His idea, I was like, that's dumb. I was like, do not do that. But what I did tell him, I said, Uncle, you came home from prison, you know, tons of ex cons and stuff. I said, bro, you should do a pop interviewing. X-Felons and y'all talking about that again, the experience, because people don't know that experience for real. Yeah, he was like, Oh man, that's a dope idea. Did he do it? No. But it's the point of you've been doing some great things, bro, and you literally on the cuffs of doing even greater. And this is just literally a huge stumbling block to try to take you off course. Right. And as long as you stay the course, bro, and you stay in your faith and you stay committed to your journey, bro. Everything is, bro, even if and we don't wish no worse. But even in the even in the face of worse, yeah, you're still coming out, bro. Again, real quickly on the biblical tip. When they threw me shack, B Shack, and the B Shacks, I like to call them the B Shacks. When they threw them in the fire, bro, it's easy to go into a furnace. You better get set on fire. It's easy to just be like, Alright, God, I don't let them turn the fire on. Right. It's another thing to start smelling gas and being like, alright, now they gonna turn the fire off. Right. Bro, they had to get, they were on fire. Right. They never got burned. But they were standing in fire, flames.

unknown 1:51:14

Right.

SPEAKER_01 1:51:15

So even in the face of worse, we still protect it, bro. Right. Even in the face of worse, we still bro, you was protected enough throughout that whole thing. Facts. You could have got paired with the dude who was bullying people.

SPEAKER_00 1:51:28

Facts.

SPEAKER_01 1:51:28

You could have got paired with somebody worse than the dude you got paired with. Facts. You could have met people who were all assholes. You could have not met one decent guy. So that that that whole thing lets you know, bro, you protected, bro. And so even in the face of whatever may be worse or whatever's coming, bro, stay the course, bro. Stay the course. You know what I'm saying? Like, you you you coming out gold on this. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 1:51:53

For sure. For sure. And and I'm gonna I'm gonna close it out with a couple things. It was like, for one though, being in there, bro, I was like, the fucked up part about it is nobody is gonna. If you can't reach me, nobody is gonna believe I'm in jail. Nobody that I know in life, whatever.

SPEAKER_01 1:52:15

I promise you, I didn't, I couldn't believe what you was posting. I said, Ain't no way.

SPEAKER_00 1:52:19

Hey, that's the last shit. Motherfuckers like, he ain't, he don't do shit. Like, he take care of the kids and work and pod and hoop and shit. You know what I'm saying? Vibrant shit. Not be in jail. Like, I'm like, damn, this is really my fucking reality. Yeah. But I'm like, shout out to my support system. I'm like, it can't, and I'm talking about support from everywhere. Even though you found out late, you still show support. For sure. Uh my son's mama, my daughter mama, my best friend, her other best friend, my girl. Um, am I forgetting anybody? Uh well, all the people that found out late. Shout out to them too. I appreciate all of them. Shout out to the people that's still in there that, you know, was trying to do the right thing to get out. Right. That was we was all, you know, supporting each other like, bro, good luck on your visit. Yo, Zoom, that mean a lot. That means a lot. That means a lot. That means a lot. So I'm like, I never would have thought the shit mean that much.

SPEAKER_01 1:53:32

There's somebody that's talking about you right now and everything you said to them while y'all was in there. Facts. Facts.

SPEAKER_00 1:53:37

I'm in that bitch preaching to the choir. I'm hey, Plymouth, we ain't landing on Plymouth Plymouth Rock. Plymouth Rock landed on us. I'm in that bitch. Hey, yo. Get his glory rolled off. Hey, we in that bitch, bro. I'm in that bitch kicking shit, bro. We laughing, we joking. I'm like, bro, we got I don't want to get too comfortable, but I just don't, I don't want, I want to lighten it up a little bit so we ain't just depressed. Cause at no point was I completely depressed. I'm like, this is a depressing situation, but I'm not depressed though. Right. But I see how it can curve your whole fucking mind to be like hopeless and everything. Over with for me, because it's so much uncertainty on that side. Yeah. You could, bro. All I kept thinking is I could easily get lost in the cracks. For sure. So many people have. Right. That I'm like, some shit could happen to you, and they never know. Yo, they could tell your people you did some bullshit and now you locked up for life. And the whole time they then did some shit, and you ain't. I'm thinking of everything, bro.

SPEAKER_01 1:54:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:54:53

I'm like, this shit is insanity. As much as I think about it, I'm like, I'm I'm so grateful for the mindset I got in this moment. I'm like, I was praying while I was in there. I'm praying for me, I'm praying for my celly, I'm praying for, you know what I'm saying? All the people that's just in here for traffic shit. Like, we ain't supposed to be here. You feel me? Tell us I mean, at some point I feel like not taking a bribe, but you should be able to pay on the spot. They should have like a tap to pay or some shit where if you really want y'all's money, even if y'all gonna upcharge us two, three hundred dollars. I'm just saying, just don't take me to jail though. Mentally, I pay it more than whatever I gotta pay for real, just to not mentally go in that.

SPEAKER_01 1:55:41

That's so genius of paying on the spot. It's like, bro, why have we not thought of that? That's why anytime I've ever gotten the slightest ticket, I pay it the same day. Yeah, I don't even try to wait and be, oh I got 30 days. Bro, no, I don't. I got 24 hours.

SPEAKER_00 1:55:57

Yeah, that's and that's the mindset I started taking while I was in there. I said, I'm never waiting again, bro. Bro, I'm never waiting again, bro.

SPEAKER_01 1:56:04

I know, I know homies with with warrants for like tickets they ain't took care of years ago. It's like, bro, bro, why? Man, why? Why would you not, bro? When they finally it again, it's that feeling of invincibility that we sell ourselves of like, no, it ain't gonna be me. Yeah, or or no, that ain't gonna happen to me. And it's like, yeah, and then bro, it again, it's one of those things, man, like, bro, if it for anybody listen, man, just take care of your stuff, bro. Like, just just just take care of your stuff and recognize, like, what the moment you feel invincible, this world will remind you real quickly, right? That you touchable. Right. And and it's a lot of different harmful ways the world will remind you that you're touchable. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 1:56:57

So facts. It's it's people in there, one dude, bro, buying 25k. Even at 10%, that's$2,500. Who just got on the average, who just got$2,500 laying around to pay to get out of jail, and then you might still have to go right back?

SPEAKER_01 1:57:16

Bro, I don't even have$2,500 in VC on 2K. I can't even upgrade my player to an 85. What you mean? 2500 to 10% 25k bro, ain't no way. Like, nah, G. Man. Nah, G. And the pressure that puts on your your family and friends to even try to help you come, bro. No, like ain't no way, bro.

SPEAKER_00 1:57:43

Ain't no way. So, all in all, I appreciate I had to hit up my dog Vince. Like, we gotta shoot the emergency pod. Nah, for sure. We gotta tap in. This just on my mind. Um, being home a little bit, it's kind of like my memory starting to fade a little bit. But in that moment, everything is so fresh. I'm like, damn, I'm gonna talk about this, this, and that. Yeah, cool. But I still got the vast majority out. If I think of some shit somewhere down the line, I'm gonna bring it back. And kudos to you, man, for Eve Hen.

SPEAKER_01 1:58:20

Bro, you I'm trying to go to sleep, hit that shower, like kudos to you for even wanting to sit down and and and you know what I'm saying, and share this and talk about it, like, on such a fresh basis, man. Like, oh yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like that, that's not you you didn't have to, you know, you know what I'm saying? And and you could have took as much time as you needed to even get to this place. So facts, you know, shout out to you for having the determination and uh willpower to push through and and and and put yourself in your situation out there and talk about it.

SPEAKER_00 1:58:56

Man, for sure, bro. Pray for them, pray for us, pray for me, pray for the community. Yeah, we need to get smart out here, bro. Like on real shit. For sure. But this gonna be the wrap up, you know what I'm saying? I appreciate all the supporters, I appreciate you, I appreciate me, I appreciate everybody that's a part of something. Shit. Sometimes people ain't gonna be able to get what they got, what they need to do done because you ain't did what you need to do first. So we all gotta just be on our job. Like Nike said, just do it, you know what I'm saying? Like, hey, until next time, there's been another edition of therapy in motion. Running with the first day out joint, and we out.